The Laughing Girl by Robert W. Chambers

Author:Robert W. Chambers
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Pronoun

XIII

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IN THE RAIN

THAT AFTERNOON I FLED THE house. This new invasion of my privacy had quite upset me. Bulgarian and Greek royalty had been difficult enough to endure, but this new wagon-load of huns and near-huns proved too much for me.

If there were any privacy at all to be had it seemed that I must seek it in the woods. And thither I fled under an umbrella, a book under one arm, a fishing rod under the other, and my pockets full of smoking material.

For I preferred to sit on the wet moss in the rain, and read and smoke and fish under my ancient green gamp—even if the seat of my trousers did become soaking wet—rather than listen to the gobbling gabble of those Teutons and witness their bad manners and their unpleasant personal habits.

So, as I say, as soon as the new arrivals had registered and had been assigned to rooms I made up my mind to inhabit the woods during their occupation of my property, and invited Smith to share my indignant seclusion.

He declined, probably because, whoever he really was and whatever might be his job, the one and the other very evidently had to do with this bunch of assorted boches.

He said very politely that he didn’t enjoy privacy when it was sopping wet. He smiled when he said it. We were standing at the desk in the big living-room: the huns, both royalty and new arrivals, had gone to their rooms, and Smith was carelessly examining the register where my guests’ signatures had been inscribed in the pale and watery ink of the country.

“A pretty kettle of fish,” I commented, looking over his shoulder. “But this new consignment of boches doesn’t seem to be camouflaged. These are their real names, I fancy.”

“I happen to know that they are,” said Smith.

He began to read the names aloud just as they were written; and I noticed the lazy amusement in his pleasant, even voice as he commented upon each signature:

“‘ General Count von Dungheim ‘! Oh, yes; he belonged to Tino’s suite when he was kicked out of Athens. They call him ‘Droly.’ He did some dirty work there—instigated the murder of the allied detachments. He’s a big, thin Prussian with a capacity for gluttony equal only to the Bulgarian King’s. He enjoys only one eye.

“‘ Baron von Bummelzug ‘! Oh, certainly. He’s a Bavarian civilian. He engineered the treacherous surrender of that Greek army corps. He also was in Tino’s suite, and still is.

“‘ Admiral Lauterlaus ‘! Tino’s ex-naval aide. Tried dirty work on the Allied fleet off Samos. A Prussian,—mostly belly and head.

“‘ Princess Pudelstoff ‘! She was that enormously fat woman, Michael, who kissed King Ferdinand on both cheeks and left two wet spots. She’s one of those German-Russians from Courland attached to the Bulgarian court, and related to Ferdinand in some degree or other,—irregularly.

“‘ Countess Manntrapp ‘! The pretty girl. You remember her honeyed, cooing voice when you were presented to her?—and her

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